Why would you have a fear about anything if you trusted yourself that you could get through it no matter what? You wouldn’t. I’d say 99% of people do not trust themselves.

Trust, like anything else, comes from repetition. Trust is a habit. Let me give you an example.

I had a car in the late ‘60s. In those days I couldn’t afford a great car. I had to buy a used one.

When it was cold, the chances of my car starting were about 50/50. You had to go out early, try to start your car and see if it would start. Even when it started when it was cold out, it would stall almost 50% of the time when you were driving it.

I was scared to death every time I got in the car. “Is it going to start or am I going to get to school or not?” I didn’t know.

And when I say scared about my car working right, you think my fear stopped once I got out of the car? It didn’t. It was embarrassing; it made me more overall nervous about myself.

Today, do you think I trust that my car is going to start? Yes, I do because it’s started a thousand times in a row. And I haven’t had any issues with it.

So how do you learn to trust something? By having that result repeat again and again. Pretty soon you expect the result, so you trust it.

Now how do you learn to trust yourself? By getting the same result again and again until you say, “Of course I trust this result. I expect it. I trust that this situation is going to happen.”

Start with one tiny little win. I’m talking about smaller goals. It’s one tiny win. That’s all.

When people learn not to trust themselves, it’s usually because they’re taking on too much.

If you want to actually follow through on a New Year’s resolution like, say, losing some weight to look and feel better–and it’s been years since you’ve paid attention to this sort of thing–forget about exercise routines and healthy eating plans, for now, if they’ve never worked before. How about trying just one new habit?

How about a healthy meal, one meal? It’s not two, two days, two meals or two weeks. It’s not a plan. Can you commit to one healthy meal?

What would one healthy breakfast look like? How hard is that? You’re not looking at a lunch. You just say, “Tomorrow for breakfast I’m having a healthy shake.” You do. That’s your breakfast. Then you can eat lunch two hours later and decide then what choice you’re going to make.

Then experiment with that for a week, and maybe give yourself two days off of doing it–maybe you choose to, maybe you don’t. The point is not to make this about pressure, at first. Small wins here matter more than the big picture ahead. Trust that you’ll get to that.

All you started with was one healthy breakfast, and you set it up so you could win. When you win, you gain confidence. When you gain confidence, you gain trust. Get enough small wins, then you take on bigger goals.

I swear you’ll realize one day, “Wow, I’ve been doing this for weeks, and it really wasn’t that hard. Now I’m ready for… ” whatever that is for you.

Whatever the goal, it’s all the same. If you’re not trusting yourself in one area of your life, chances are it’s affecting multiple if not all areas. The content just changes. This time it’s eating. The next time it’s business. The next time it’s the kids.

The truth is that if you trusted yourself a lot of the issues you have in your life would just disappear.

Originally published @  Harv Eker